One of those days!

Ever have one of those days? Today is one of those days. In fact, the past few days have been "one of those days".

I know I love God with all of my heart but these days the things of the world have been so attractive, so appealing.

It's not that I am doing things wrong, more it is just a struggle to do things right. To not be selfish or self-serving.

It is when I have one of those days that I really don't understand your grace Lord. How can you still love me when I am struggling to love you? How can you forgive me when I am struggling to forgive myself?

I am actually writing this in church. Scribbling it down on a piece of paper. Truth be told, I didn't even want to be here today.

Interestingly, one of the worship songs was one I've referred to in a past blog. It is Matt Maher's "Christ is Risen?. I was pretty tuned out during worship (rare for me) till we got to this song and the verse:

Beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but heaven's will
No scheme of hell, no scoffer's crown
No burden great can hold You down
In strength You reign
Forever let Your church proclaim

I am really not sure why this verse is speaking to me now or even what it is saying but I am going to meditate on it for a while.

Wow...God you are listening and you are in control. Bob, our pastor, just stood up to preach. The first words out of his mouth (not verbatim, but it was something like this)...while we might separate ourselves from God, we are never separate from God. He then used a scripture verse about God never leaving you or forsaking you...maybe Hebrews 13:5.

I prefer for this one, Deuteronomy 31:6 "Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the LORD your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you."

WOW...did I need to hear this today.

I am not surprised this is happening to me right now. This is a critical time as I set out on a new chapter in life serving Christ in ministry. Satan would like nothing more than to have me separate myself from God. Satan has that divide and conquer mentality.

As I sit and reflect on the words I have put to paper I realize that I am not separating myself from Him but in this simple way have opened my heart and mind to allow His spirit and His grace to fill me full again. Rather than shutting Him out, this is as invitation for Him to come in.

Thank God, literally, that He never leaves us.

Can you do me a favour? Can you pray for me?

Romans 15:13
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.